From Sadness To Joy

By Valentine Obienyem—

Yesterday evening, I took my daughter to a place where she would have her hair plaited, while others would have a normal haircut. As we went along, we engaged in our usual father–daughter banter. My daughter was convinced that I followed her there only because she is still 17.

“Daddy, next year, when I turn 18 and become an adult, you will no longer follow me,” she said.

When we arrived, there was only one person in the queue. I was confused about whether the person was a boy or a girl, so I asked. It turned out to be a young boy, barely out of his teenage years, who wanted his hair plaited like that of girls.

Intending to embarrass him, I asked him a few questions, but he did not respond. My daughter quickly intervened: “Daddy, he is wearing ear pods and cannot hear you.” I had to signal to him before he removed the earbuds and listened.

I then asked him a barrage of questions:

“Are you a man or a woman?”

“I am a man,” he replied.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“So why are you waiting in this queue for this kind of hairstyle?”

“Who taught you that this is what a man should look like?”

“Do you know who you are?”

“Do you understand what you represent?”

“Is this how you want to be known?”

“Have you thought about the example you are setting for younger ones?”

“Why are you gradually losing yourself like this?”

As I reflected on the encounter, I wondered why there is so much effeminate degeneration among our youth. A society that is producing the likes of Bobrisky is gravely sick. One only needed a passing glance at the young man’s attached picture to see the hair attachment he had bought, resting on a chair beside him.

On our way to church for Christmas night mass, I narrated the incident to my wife, feeling deeply saddened. However, as soon as I entered the church, my sadness turned into joy as we experienced the radiant joy of Christmas.

The sermon by Fr. Chigozie Jidere was profound and enlightening. Drawing from the Bible reading of the day, he explained why Jesus was born in a manger. According to the Gospel of Luke (2:6–7), Mary and Joseph travelled to Bethlehem for a Roman census. The town was crowded, and there was no room for them in the inn. As a result, Mary gave birth in a place meant for animals, and the baby Jesus was laid in a manger—a feeding trough.

From this, the priest drew the first lesson: just as Mary and Joseph searched for a place where Jesus could be born, Christmas is a season of a similar search. It is God’s quiet question to each of us: Is there room for me?

Are we prepared to offer Jesus a place in our hearts to be born anew? This demands that we rid our hearts of sin, pride, bitterness, and indifference, and make them fit and worthy dwelling places for the Lord.

Beyond our hearts, he challenged us to prepare other spaces as well. Our homes should become places where love, forgiveness, prayer, and peace reign. Our workplaces should reflect honesty, diligence, justice, and compassion. Our communities should be places of fairness and mutual respect. Our relationships—between spouses, parents and children, friends and neighbours—should become living spaces where Christ is welcomed through patience, kindness, and mercy.

He also spoke of making room for Christ in our public life: in how we speak, how we lead, how we treat the vulnerable, and how we respond to those who differ from us. Even our moments of silence, our suffering, and our struggles can become places where Christ is born, if we invite Him in.

Christmas, therefore, is not merely about celebrating a birth long ago in Bethlehem; it is about creating room – here and now – for God to dwell among us.

The second lesson focused on the lowly place of Christ’s birth. Being born in a manger highlights Jesus’ humility. Christians believe that the Son of God chose not to enter the world in wealth or power, but in simplicity and poverty, identifying with the lowly and marginalised.“Though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor” (2 Corinthians 8:9).

Fr. Jidere emphasised that being born in a manger did not prevent Christ from attaining greatness. He encouraged us not to see our lowly beginnings or present circumstances as barriers to greatness, but to align ourselves with God’s purpose for our lives. He further explained that Christmas is a time of joy and sharing, especially with the less privileged.

The end of the Mass was heralded by joyful Christmas songs that set the entire congregation dancing. Voices rose in unison, hands clapped, and feet moved rhythmically as the church was filled with laughter, warmth, and gratitude. In that moment, barriers dissolved—age, status, and circumstance gave way to shared celebration. The solemn reflections of the liturgy flowed naturally into joy, reminding us that the message of Christmas is not only to be contemplated but also to be lived and expressed in thanksgiving and praise.